Better days…

I was told the older I get – the faster time will go.  I didn’t think life could go any faster, but I find that indeed it does!  Today we are on the brink of starting another new year.  A time to look back and reflect on our accomplishments, our disappointments, our joys, our sorrows, our dreams, our failures…everything that’s wrapped up into this thing we call life.  I wish I could say that I achieved everything that I hoped for this year, or that it was without sadness, but I can’t and that’s ok.  There isn’t anyone alive that doesn’t have trials in their life from time to time.  My prayer for you this year is that you learn from them and rely on the One that can turn them into something you never imagined.  Like this blog…it’s given me an avenue of healing I never expected.  Thank you for taking the time to check it out.  If it touches just one person and let’s them know they are not alone, it’s worth every risk of putting myself out there.  The pastor at our church on Sunday asked if we were willing to “Stand Out”. This has been my step to stand out on what I believe God is calling me to do…even though it’s been really scary. I pray that this year you find what God is calling you to and you take the step that He is asking you to take.  I promise He will be with you.  And if 2013 brought you hardship, I pray that this year brings you better days…

“Better Days”

And you ask me what I want this year
And I try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
Cause I don’t need boxes wrapped in strings
And designer love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
So take these words
And sing out loud
Cause everyone is forgiven now
Cause tonight’s the night the world begins again
I need someplace simple where we could live
And something only you can give
And thats faith and trust and peace while we’re alive
And the one poor child who saved this world
And there’s 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them
So take these words
And sing out loud
Cause everyone is forgiven now
Cause tonight’s the night the world begins again
I wish everyone was loved tonight
And somehow stop this endless fight
Just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
So take these words
And sing out loud
Cause everyone is forgiven now
Cause tonight’s the night the world begins again
Cause tonight’s the night the world begins again
Happy New Year everyone!  Love each other…because love matters!

My greatest gift…

I wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas!  I hope you are enjoying special time with your family and friends.

The greatest gift I received this year was my son attending Christmas Eve Service with our family.  He hasn’t attended church regularly for a few years now, and although he did attend the Christmas Eve Service last year, he was apprehensive about attending this year.  He knows that a lot of people at our church now know that he is gay.  I could tell by the way he chewed his fingernails incessantly during the service that he was nervous about being there. He went because he knew it meant a lot to us.  He is one of the bravest people I know.  I could barely contain my emotions as he sat in the row in front of me (we had a lot of people with us and the young adults all sat together).  Thank you to the person who said hello, shook his hand, and asked how he was doing.  You know who you are and it meant more than you can even imagine.

Today I share with you a video about grace written by Beth Moore.  Visuals by Stephen Proctor, and music by Tony Anderson.  May we all share God’s grace with each other this coming year:

Get a grip people…

512px-Rubber_duckOk…so I haven’t been on here in a while because I had a 15 day migraine. The last thing I wanted to do is stare at a computer screen.  Maybe that’s a good thing because I wasn’t subjected to the whole Phil Robertson scandal.  Now that I’m back online, I’ve seen my fair share of it and it makes me sad.  It’s like Satan took a piece of meat and threw it to a pack of hungry wolves. While everyone is bickering, there are people in our country suffering because they are homeless, hungry, sick… What a way to distract God’s people.

Freedom of speech…we all have it even though many are complaining that we don’t.  Phil Robertson expressed his opinion and some people didn’t like what he had to say and made that very clear.  His ability to express himself wasn’t taken away….he wasn’t thrown in jail, or worse.  But we all need to understand that sometimes there are consequences for how we express our opinion…especially if we are in the public eye and represent a company or organization.  If Christians would just understand that it’s not so much what they say that starts a controversy, it’s their delivery.  People want to be treated like human beings with dignity. The whole thought of “hate the sin…love the sinner” sounds so nice and righteous, but it falls so short of how we are to treat others.  Many times the hate is obvious, but the love is not.  If we really followed that philosophy, we would treat everyone equally because let’s face it…we are ALL sinners.  But the truth is…we don’t treat everyone the same.

Unless you are gay, you will never understand what it’s like.  I’ve been a Christian most of my life.  I’ve never been persecuted for it, or judged for it.  I’ve never been bullied for being a Christian, and I’ve never had to think about being attacked while walking down the street.  I can go to any church that I choose and I will be welcomed there. My friends and family have not turned their back on me and I haven’t had strangers yell at me at my job because I was a Christian. The same can not be said for many gay people.

I know there are all kinds of radical groups out there on both sides of this issue.  Christian vs. gay.  Things are going to be said that offend both groups. Sometimes you just have to agree to disagree.  Words carry great power and the results of their sting can be long-lasting.  Everyone is so worried about being “right”…making sure their point is heard.  Instead of getting our feathers so ruffled, let’s focus on the hurting people in our world.  If Jesus lived here and now, I don’t think he would be sitting at his computer arguing his point.  I think he would be with people showing them His Father’s love.

Because love matters….

The land of what if’s…

FROSTY THE SNOWMANSeeing the commercials for the upcoming Christmas shows for kids always bring back fond memories.  I can remember the excitement of this time of year as a kid.  I loved watching those shows because it meant Christmas was getting close.  Some of my favorite characters were the Heat Miser, Rudolph, the Misfit Toys, and of course Santa.  But there was one show that made me cry EVERY year.  Frosty the Snowman.  It didn’t matter that I knew what was coming…seeing Frosty melt was just too much for me.  I remember trying to come up with a plan to keep Frosty “alive”.  As a child, I wanted to make a house out of ice that Frosty could live in year round.  What if that could really happen?  Then he wouldn’t have to melt…right?

As I’ve mentioned, when I first learned that my son was gay I went to Christian resources to find out what to do.  I read articles, listened to CD’s, researched, and prayed.  I found a lot of resources that promised change. However, the things that were referenced in the materials didn’t make sense for my family.  The things they “blamed” being gay on weren’t in our family dynamics.  I was always left feeling like my husband and I were responsible in some way.  What if…in the beginning of my journey was a phrase I used a lot.

  • What if my husband didn’t have to travel so much when the kids were younger…
  • What if I didn’t have an auto immune disease that left me tired with fevers, headaches, and joint pain…
  • What if we had lived in a different neighborhood with more boys for my son to play with…
  • What if he went to public school where he would have had more boys to choose to hang out with instead of being with the same kids for all 8 years in the private school he went to…
  • What if we lived closer to family so he would have more male influences…

I “what if’d” myself TO DEATH!  I needed to change my way of thinking so of course I went to God for help.  I can’t tell you how many conversations I had with Him…and still have today.  I just wanted to do His will in this situation.  I got a little spiral notebook and started writing verses in it to help me focus on Him.  I filled that one and got another one…and then another one.  I carried these notebooks with me all the time…and still do to this day.  I have the Bible verses divided into sections with titles like these:photo (6)

Hope – Isaiah 40:31
Protection – Ephesians 6:12-13
Thanksgiving – Philippians 4:6
Praise – Psalm 95:1-2
Rest – Proverbs 3:5-6
Help – Psalm 147:3
Cares – Nahum 1:7
Faith – 1 Corinthians 16:13
Peace – Romans 5:1

This helped me so much.  It kept me connected to God during a time when I could have very easily stepped away.  I am so very grateful for His strength, love, hope, and confirmation that He loves my son no matter what. Confirmation that my husband and I did not cause this to happen.  So…

  • What if my son was given to my husband and I because God trusted us to handle it in a way that was honoring to Him…
  • What if God has given me a voice through this journey that He wants me to share with other gay people and their families that are ignored by the church…or worse…condemned by it…
  • What if the reason He didn’t “change” my son is because he is fearfully and wonderfully made exactly as God planned for him to be…

What if we are called to love because He first loved us…

Because love matters…