(I am having technical difficulties and needed to publish this post again. I apologize for the repeat)

I remember I had Good Morning America on in the background as I was getting ready for the day. The kids weren’t back to school yet because their school was under construction and it wasn’t finished yet. Kyle had spent the night at a friend’s house and I was getting ready to pick him up. The television caught my attention when they said a plane had flown into one of the towers. At first, the reporters on GMA thought it was a terrible accident. At this time, I was glued to the television just sick over the poor people in that plane and in that building. I will never ever forget the image of seeing that second plane coming in and crashing into the other tower. It was then that we all realized this was no accident. As I’m sure you have gathered, I am referring to 9/11. As I have been reflecting on that day, I am so saddened where this country is right now in regard to how we treat our fellow Americans. Where is our kindness? Where is our fierce solidarity? Our politicians need to get their act together and learn how to find common ground. We need to stop listening to the radicals on both sides of the fence that are trying to divide us just to get elected again. The lies they spew are unnecessary fuel to the fires that pit us against one another. If you can’t get elected with decency, then you don’t deserve the office you hold onto so tightly. Enough is enough!

That was my Facebook post on the anniversary of 9/11 this year. Since we are coming up on an election year, opinions are loud and the bickering is sickening. It seems that most politicians feel that they need a common enemy with the people in order to get elected. This isn’t new…I just never realized it was so prevalent until I was close to a marginalized group that was targeted. Right now, one of those groups is the LGBTQ+ community with a concentration on trans and non-binary people.

I promise this isn’t a political post. I fear I would be tuned out if I made it political. Instead, this is a post about the human heart and mind.

Did you know that in 2023 there have been over 520 anti-LGBTQ+ bills introduced in state legislatures. A record number. Over 220 bills specifically targeted trans and non-binary people…also a record. A record 70 anti-LGBTQ+ bills have been enacted so far this year. I want you imagine living in a world where your existence is being challenged, fought against, and then put into law to the point where you can’t exist. What do you think that would do to your soul? What do you think it would do to your mind…your heart?

Imagine living in a state that suddenly has a LAW that prohibits you from getting the care you need for your transgender child. Imagine having to sell your house, leave your job and your extended family, to move to another state that doesn’t have said law. For how long? Could that state follow suit? Where does it end? What burden does that child carry because their family had to uproot everything they knew to relocate? What stress does that create in the family dynamic? Oh…but the children…we MUST protect them. Really??

If our government deems it necessary and says it protects children, then it must be true. Right? So that breeds ignorance and people who don’t know anything about the subject matter start fighting for it too…regurgitating what they hear even though most of it is unfounded and damaging…and while this is happening their children are absorbing these untruths and attitudes. What might that look like?

This is one example of what that looks like…A 13 year old child who identifies as non-binary was bullied terribly at their school when their classmates found out. Rumors were spread about them. The kids said things to them like, “No one likes you.”, “What’s wrong with you?”, “Don’t talk to us ever again.” The whole class ganged up on them. The last blow was when their best friend told them to kill themselves. Their parents came home to find them cutting themselves in the driveway and then there was a suicide attempt. It took a lot of effort to keep the child alive. I get that as I too have lived it with my child. Thankfully they have been moved from the small school they attended and after some therapy are doing much better.

I have a transgender friend who has gotten countless death threats on social media. Comment after comment rolls in tearing them down explicitly detailing how the person would like them to die.

Fighting for your existence…takes a toll. Being constantly told that who you are is wrong or who you love is wrong…takes a toll. The words that are carelessly tossed like grenades…take a toll.

Imagine being told your father died of Covid because of your “sin of homosexuality.”

Imagine being told you have “a demon of homosexuality” living in you by your mother. Then imagine her slamming you against a glass sliding door in your house while hitting you with a Bible screaming, “I command you to get out of him Satan!” Imagine your every move is monitored to see if you are thinking of “that wicked lifestyle.” Nothing you do is right or good enough and it all leads to you being gay.

And then there are the faces of the kids that came to my tent at the recent Pride event I did that tell me their mothers won’t talk to them. “Can I please have a hug…my mom doesn’t love me anymore.” How is this ok?? How does a mother look at her child and think that is the right stance to take? You know the saying that people will kiddingly say when they do something mischievous…”the devil made me do it!” Sadly, this disowning of children is coming from people saying, “God wants me to do it.”

I learned about something recently that was really fascinating to me, and at the same time I found horrifying.

IKEA did a public service announcement ad called “Bully A Plant.” It was some time ago, but I had never heard of it. It’s only 2 minutes and 17 seconds long and you can watch it here. In case you think that was a fluke, here’s a middle school girl who did the same kind of experiment. It’s also short and you can watch it here. And in case you think it’s just stupid luck to get the same results, here’s a sciency (yes I made up that word spell check – leave me alone) explanation from actual scientists that also did the experiment:

INTERNATIONAL JOURNAL OF INNOVATIVE RESEARCH IN TECHNOLOGY Vol 8, Issue 1, June 2021 Deepika Choube, Shubham Sharma Department of Psychology, Doon University, Dehradun, India “Plant seeds under the influence of the positive words had a higher germination rate, and these plants grew taller, larger, and healthier than [those] in the negative environment.”

For those of you who won’t watch the videos, here is a brief explanation. If you did watch them, you can move on to the next paragraph (smile). In all of the instances, two identical plants were put into the same environment with the same amount of light and water. One plant was bullied (students said mean things to the plant), and the other was complimented. The plant that was bullied died in 6 days while the other plant grew and flourished.

Six days and the plant died. Six days. I shudder to think of what is happening in the bodies, minds, and hearts of LGBTQ+ individuals that deal with bullying, discrimination, death threats, and laws enacted against them. I shudder to think of how their souls, their minds, and their hearts hurt each day as they fight to exist. As I stated in my first paragraph, where has the love of our fellow Americans gone? As we fight each side so hard to “make America great again” do we see that we are trampling our very own people in the process. Precious souls created in the image of God. Surely God must weep.

A person marrying someone of the same sex does not hurt you.

A person changing their name does not hurt you.

A person asking to be called by a pronoun does not hurt you.

But…not allowing these things, or dismissing these things, or refusing to do these things just may be killing them. Six days. These kids are our future.

It may be time to put aside how you think someone should live their lives and instead accept them for who they tell you they are inside. If six days can do this to a plant, what must six weeks, six months, six years do to a soul. It’s time to love on the LGBTQ+ community. Their lives depend on it.

And love matters…