Neither height nor depth…

The only way I can even begin to wrap my brain around how much God loves me is to think about the love I have for my children.  I would do anything for them.  When they were little, even the most frustrating day could be made better by sneaking in their rooms at bedtime and watching them sleep.  They always looked like little angels and the days frustrations just melted away.  And in the morning…we had a fresh start.

It’s hard for me to believe sometimes that God’s love for us is even stronger than the love I have for my children.  He sees our mess, He knows our hearts, and He loves us.  Oh how He loves us.  One of my favorite verses is Romans 8:38-39 (NIV):

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Notice that there isn’t a “but” in that verse or an “if”.  Nothing can separate us from His love.  As much as I love my children and family, my love is nothing in comparison to God’s love.  God is love.

When people find out that I have a gay son, a common response is “of course you love him…he’s your son.” For some, that statement seems to imply that if he wasn’t my son, I wouldn’t love him…that somehow he wouldn’t be worthy of love because he is gay.  It’s as if you are saying, “well I think same sex attraction is a sin, but what are you going to do, he is your son and you love him.”  My son is not the first gay person that I’ve ever known.  Over the years I’ve known many gay people.  I found that they were just like me.  Regardless of whether or not you think same sex attraction is a sin, I love my son despite the fact that he is a sinner.  Just like I love my husband, despite the fact that he is a sinner.  Just like God loves you, despite the fact that you are a sinner.

When Jesus was asked, “of all the commandments, which is the most important?”  He answered in Mark 12:29-31 (NIV):

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.  Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.  The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.  There is no commandment greater than these.”

It seems to me that this love thing was pretty important to Jesus.  And I think the reason for that is…love matters.

10 thoughts on “Neither height nor depth…

  1. Lesa – I’m praying and hoping that with your writings and NALT (Not All Like That – project), Justin Lee’s book Torn and other formats we can someday convince the church community that Gay people and Gay families should be a treasured part of our church family?

    On Sunday mornings at church – I see people wearing their favorite football jersey – with the name of their favorite player, someone that they cheer for, heroes, players that make them feel good – a treasured part of the team they root for.

    That got me thinking. If I had to pick what name to put on my purple jersey it would be your son’s. He’s a hero in my book, a person I would be proud to root for – He’s a survivor – of adolescence, a survivor of waking up for school every morning not knowing who was going to humiliate or demean him that day. He’s survived the jokes, the words, the lack of understanding, the church and the verses that some misuse to condemn him. He’s survived the thoughts of why, let’s just end it – what have I done –why me.
    In my way of thinking your son is my hero – I would be proud to have Kyles name on my purple jersey, but I don’t own a jersey – so I’ll just have to keep Kyle’s name close to my heart, the same way God does.

    I am very fortunate to have Kyle as a friend. I like Kyle just the way God made Kyle.

    Larry D

    • Thank you for your kind words Larry. Kyle is one of the strongest people that I know. He has overcome so much pain in his life. I am thankful for your friendship with him. Thank you for showing him Jesus…for having “Starbucks” church with him, loving him unconditionally, and mostly for showing him that not all Christians are judging. I’m hoping that one day he will be able to turn back to God…knowing that God loves him.

  2. This brought me to tears. That’s my nephew! He is a champion! I’ve always thought he was amazing…but the reasons just keep growing abound. My heart is full of much love that I have the honor of knowing him ❤

  3. I came accross your blog and read this post on Love. Wow! This is another confirmation that God has given us about our gay son. He recently shared with us his struggles by sobbing uncontrollably. All I could do was cry with him and hug him and tell him that I love him.

    This is a process for us ( we are very conservative) but we see our son as someone very special and should not be treated differently. We love him and I believe we can love him unconditionally!

    • Hi Nathan. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I know what you mean about it being a process. My heart goes out to you and your family. I know it’s not an easy journey, but as you know God is with you and it makes the journey a little easier. Thank you for loving your son. There are many Christian parents that turn their backs on their gay children. It’s heart breaking. Keep close to God and He will show you the way. Blessings to you and your family!

      • I appreciate your kind words. Last night I took my kids to the county fair here in Florida. When we were walking toward the entrance to leave my son was talking to 2 gay teens. It just struck me then and there that the church will accept a male and female living together but if my son even has a gay thought he would not be welcomed. I was angry at the church and at myself for picking and choosing.

        My wife and I will love our son no matter what! This is Christ’s command.

      • The way the church has cheated gay people is very frustrating. But I really think it comes from a place of ignorance. Unless you go through something like this personally, I think it is really hard to understand. I feel that is why God has called me to share my story. Not that it will make a huge difference, but it’s a start.

      • I appreciate your kind words. Last night I took my kids to the county fair here in Florida. When we were walking toward the entrance to leave my son was talking to 2 gay teens. It just struck me then and there that the church will accept a male and female living together but if my son even has a gay thought he would not be welcomed. I was angry at the church and at myself for picking and choosing.

        My wife and I will love our son no matter what! This is Christ’s command.

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